From This Moment

   There I was, standing before a simple pathway. I had often walked and jogged that same route with ease and not a care in the world, now I was standing there with one leg shaking and quivering and one arm doing who knows what and words and thoughts had melted like wax; I felt a war was going on inside my head. Yes this was the hill that suddenly became my mountain, just after the stroke everything seemed almost impossible to overcome; miles and miles away.

   I quickly looked down at my feet, the very feet that brought me everywhere without any complications, there I was fighting for every step, every moment, every dream and trying to silence every single nightmare. I took the reigns of my worries and doubts and laid them before God and said "I'm here in this dilemma and you are a God of miracles, so make your miracles happen in every fear I face!" I held to those very thoughts and pushed and pushed my way through. Whatever we face, the beautiful thing is this, God is always bigger than our biggest fears, our biggest trials, adversities and our tears. He always has a plan, sometimes it's among a haze, a fog of war but God is the lighthouse and He is ever faithful.

We can have comfort in knowing that whatever was meant for evil, God can make it for His good. Now I'm doing public speaking, demonstrations in martial arts as well as creating art, poetry, photography and much much more. Never let go of God's promises, He is faithful and true...

Run The Race

As I was training yesterday, I had the most difficult time running after cross-training, though I'm sure it was me testing my limits physically, it really felt like a mental battle. I knew that in the back of my mind, the stroke was playing a big part, I had bouts of sudden weakness (stroke symptoms) and word finding was a definite fight. I paused along my run and just took a deep breath and realized this was a good battle, this was a victory I was searching for.
I wanted to tell this stroke again and again that it had no place inside my mind for limitations. I prayed quickly and thanked God for every little ounce of blood, sweat and many tears along this massive uphill battle with my stroke over the years. It had taught me the greatest things I know in life. First off, I train with a purpose both in physical goals and in spiritual goals, for without purpose people perish; people wander and lose their way. Life isn't about how easy it should be but rather how will you overcome it despite the adversity. I trust in God and it is well with my soul and whatever I face I face it with confidence, with a heart after His glory and His purpose and whatever my lot is in life, I will do it well.

Lions Den

When I faced my stroke,

there were many times I couldn't speak,

express my thoughts,

move or understand

but I knew one thing,

I was facing a circumstance for which I could only simply be still and let God do what He does best, turn hungry circumstances of potential great loss into a victory for which only God can be glorified. That is truly what He has done for me :) Just trust Him and keep on praying, keep on living the gospel message and let God do the impossible.

Psalm 18:2
The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior;
my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.
He is my shield, the power that saves me,
and my place of safety.

Laugh With Joy

When I had to learn how to read, write, walk and talk again, there was something so deep and so profound that God could only provide and that was the joy that surpases sorrow, that overcomes misery, that triumphs over adversity and that was and is the joy of the Lord; knowing that even in the darkest times God always brings the sunshine of His promises, the joy that overcomes the deepest valley. When I was able to literally laugh again, it was and is a sweet simple joy that I shall use until it is no more ;)

By Ernie Kasper ~ Stroke Survivor

Beyond The Pain

There I was, quivering, shaking uncontrollably...

     I felt a lightening bolt surge through my body and the next thing I knew, I was on the ground shaking. I just fought to walk just a few feet and it took everything in me to do it and then I found out seizures became another battle I would surely have to face on a regular basis. The daily tasks that so many people take for granted, I took for granted, now they were mountains of trials; journeys I never new that would test my determination. I felt often frustrated, taxed by new challenges that would face my life. 

     The stroke took everything from me except one thing, my determination, it simply couldn't find a way to remove that very thing that would lead me to where I am today!

Yesterday was a monumental moment, I ran a huge distance along a winding trail with so many ups and downs and there I was, persistent to the very end. I finished my goal and after 8 long years I came to this very point! VICTORY!!!

God always has a plan and when we feel like He isn't there, He is the very one who is sustaining us, challenging us, encouraging us softly. My roots have grown deeper than ever, my understanding of what really matters in life is far greater than before and my joy for life, thankfulness in the simple things makes me one happy guy!

Thankfulness is an art and its returns are endless...

When I Am Weak

                      It has been my greatest inspiration for poetry, artwork, photography and everything else I do, my stroke broke me and God healed me in ways I thought would never happen. He brought me confidence when my flesh was weak, He brought me faithfulness when faithfulness in friends could not be found, He restored my courage when no courage could be seen. My faith is in His devoted love and His perfect plan.